To really love is a great discipline, because we must love stably and consistently and regardless of whether or not our love is returned. In other words, we love despite our likes and dislikes, despite our selves or egos. We simply ALLOW love to be a transformative force in our lives. ALLOWING is the key. And this is not a passive but an active discipline... Genuine love asks for nothing in return, through it always works toward duplicating itself in others. Thus, the greatest reward for one who practices the discipline of love is that another being has been illumined by that love and is now carrying that gift to others.
There has to be enough communication so that silence can be a grace. That kind of silence demands a deeper love, and until that much love is developed, there is no point in pretending that the love is there when it isn't. The justification of silence in our life is that we love one another to be silent together ... In the depths of community life, we realize the grace of being silent together, but we don't arrive at this by excluding others or treating them as objects. It happens gradually as we learn to love ... The need is for a true silence which is alive and which carries a loving presence.